jonno
Member of DD Central
nil satis nisi optimum
Posts: 2,808 
Likes: 3,242
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Jokes
Feb 23, 2015 9:58:29 GMT
Post by jonno on Feb 23, 2015 9:58:29 GMT
"Eh dad,what's the capital of Brazil?"
"Dunno son"
"Eh dad,what's the highest mountain in the UK?"
"Dunno son"
"Eh dad,what's the largest mammal in the world?"
"Dunno son"
"Am I annoying you dad?"
"Of course not; you'll never learn anything if you don't ask questions".
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markr
Member of DD Central
Posts: 766
Likes: 426
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Post by markr on Feb 23, 2015 11:37:45 GMT
A friend of mine told me she had Monkees disease. I wasn't sure at first, but then I saw her face...
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jonno
Member of DD Central
nil satis nisi optimum
Posts: 2,808
Likes: 3,242
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Jokes
Feb 23, 2015 12:31:43 GMT
Post by jonno on Feb 23, 2015 12:31:43 GMT
A friend of mine told me she had Monkees disease. I wasn't sure at first, but then I saw her face... OK OK I believe you.
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markr
Member of DD Central
Posts: 766
Likes: 426
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Post by markr on Feb 27, 2015 17:02:49 GMT
I've just had a massive argument down at the Helium balloon filling factory. Well, I won't be spoken to in that tone of voice.
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Post by p2perrr on Mar 13, 2015 8:25:44 GMT
“Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.”
RIP Sir Terry Pratchett. 12.03.2015
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Bagman
Member of DD Central
Posts: 209
Likes: 131
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Post by Bagman on Mar 13, 2015 14:43:30 GMT
I once had a girlfriend that lived in the Ukraine.
She was my chick in Kiev.
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Post by oldnick on Mar 29, 2015 19:03:12 GMT
My wife texted me earlier to say she was in casualty. I watched the whole 50 minutes but couldn't see her.
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jonno
Member of DD Central
nil satis nisi optimum
Posts: 2,808
Likes: 3,242
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Post by jonno on Mar 31, 2015 13:18:27 GMT
I went into a record shop earlier,and asked the assistant what he had by The Doors? "A bucket of sand and a fire extinguisher" he replied.
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jonno
Member of DD Central
nil satis nisi optimum
Posts: 2,808
Likes: 3,242
|
Jokes
Apr 3, 2015 10:10:46 GMT
Post by jonno on Apr 3, 2015 10:10:46 GMT
What's the difference between a WAG and a Tesco trolley?
A Tesco trolley has a mind of its own.
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Jokes
Apr 3, 2015 12:41:01 GMT
Post by jevans4949 on Apr 3, 2015 12:41:01 GMT
What's the difference between a WAG and a Tesco trolley? A Tesco trolley has a mind of its own. That used to be "What's the difference betweeen a *** party politician and a Tesco trolley?" *** insert party of your choice
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jonno
Member of DD Central
nil satis nisi optimum
Posts: 2,808
Likes: 3,242
|
Post by jonno on Apr 3, 2015 12:43:50 GMT
What's the difference between a WAG and a Tesco trolley? A Tesco trolley has a mind of its own. That used to be "What's the difference betweeen a *** party politician and a Tesco trolley?" *** insert party of your choice Mmmm.............. Nah,too wide a choice 
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j
Member of DD Central
Penguins are very misunderstood!
Posts: 2,188
Likes: 540
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Jokes
Apr 7, 2015 19:46:14 GMT
Post by j on Apr 7, 2015 19:46:14 GMT
Knock knock...
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Jokes
Apr 7, 2015 19:48:43 GMT
via mobile
Post by oldnick on Apr 7, 2015 19:48:43 GMT
Who's there?
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j
Member of DD Central
Penguins are very misunderstood!
Posts: 2,188
Likes: 540
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Jokes
Apr 7, 2015 20:05:13 GMT
Post by j on Apr 7, 2015 20:05:13 GMT
Iva...
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Jokes
Apr 7, 2015 20:29:55 GMT
via mobile
Post by oldnick on Apr 7, 2015 20:29:55 GMT
Iva who?
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